Business & Money
Most big decisions in business are made via a methodical cost-benefit analysis. You way the risks, opportunity costs, your chance of success, and much more.
By all of the traditional measures, a wedding is a poor investment. We’re comfortable, but by no means wealthy (not just yet at least ;). It’s a poor financial decision to spend the amount of money that we did for what basically amounts to a big party.
But then you realize that it’s not every day that you get to celebrate the love you share with the women of your dreams. It’s not every day that you get to feast your eyes on your prize and listen to her explain why she has, for some unknown reason, picked you (yes, that’s me crying like a baby during her vows).
When I look back on last Saturday, I would do it all again in a heartbeat. In fact, I would spend twice as much. There is literally no price you can put on the best day of your life. I got to marry the dopest person on planet earth, then celebrate with all of the people in our lives that deeply care about us. And it was LIT!!
I hate to be cliche, but some things in life are simply priceless. For everything else there’s Master Card (or more accurately Chase Sapphire Reserve).
This section usually talks about the progress of technology, knowledge, or the human condition in some sense. But as you’re already aware, my thoughts are otherwise occupied at the present moment.
As an individual, when I think about my own progress, it’s hard not to think about all of the teachers that have helped me along the way. I could very easily talk about the teacher that helped me fall in love with mathematics as a child, I could talk about friend’s dads who helped me understand the role of a man in a family, neighbors that taught me about community… the list is pretty long (for that I am very thankful).
But when I really think about it, one teacher stands above the rest. I wrote about her in my vows this past weekend. Here they are:
I don’t love you because you’re beautiful.
I don’t love you because you’re weird or because you do these weird dances every morning when you wake up.
I don’t love you because you buy me a blueberry scone every Sunday after your workout class.
I don’t love you because you hide cute post-it notes all over the house whenever you go on a trip.
I love you because you have been, and continue to be, my greatest teacher.
You’ve taught me about the importance of balance in one’s life.
You have taught me that it doesn’t matter what you meant, but how you made someone else feel.
You’ve taught me how to apologize.
You’ve taught me that caring for the people you love is more important than going to work or sticking to a schedule.
You’ve taught me that the small things matter far more than the big things.
You’ve taught me that it’s ok not to be perfect, as long as you’re willing to commit to improving.
Most importantly, you’ve taught me that love is too simple a word to describe how I feel about you.
I adore you.
I am infatuated with you.
I am memorized by everything that you are.
And lastly, I am truly grateful that you’ve agreed to put up with me for the rest of your life.
From this day forward, I promise to try my best
to be everything for you, that you are for me.
When I was in the fourth grade, a new kid came to my school. We were both type A people so we immediately clashed. I wasn’t a big fan of someone trying to encroach on my territory. Turns out he was a great guy and would become one of my best friends. I look up to him with so much respect and admiration. And this past weekend, 20 years after the day we met, he stood by my side as I took the plunge into the next chapter of my life.
When I was trying to decide where to go to college, there were a lot to choose from. But when I went on my visit to NYU, it just felt right. More than the school, New York City just felt right. It’s the only time I’ve ever had love at first sight (sorry babe). And this was another time where cost-benefit analysis went out the window. There were other options offering a full ride, some wanted to pay me to come, some would have offered an opportunity to prolong my basketball career, and of course the Ivy League option was pretty attractive. But despite all that I went with my gut. And I’m so happy I did. I’ve met so many incredible friends, started a career I’m excited about, discovered passions, and oh yea, met the woman that I now call my wife.
Speaking of my wife, I met her randomly on valentines day in 2009. I was sitting in my dorm with friends, and was convinced to go out with one of the homies as his wing man. He was actually interested in my future wife, but got pretty drunk and lost his focus (aka had a few too many at the bar and left with someone else). Of course, I had to capitalize on his mistake. Actually, nothing really happened that night of significance, but it would become the seedling of what quickly became a relationship a few weeks later (she completely ignored me for 2 weeks, probably because I was sending the 1 AM text “what are you up to?” lol).
The common thread in the list above is that all of these things just happened. I point this out because I think there are many times in life when we overthink things. We spend a lot of time making that two column pro and con list trying to figure out which decision is right. And that is not a bad exercise, in and of itself. But it seems that many of the most important things in life just happen and sometimes is best to just see where it goes.
My Latest Discovery
My wife and I have discovered the best photographer in the game. When my wife wanted to fly her out from Seattle for our wedding, I thought that was a stupid decision and an unnecessary expense. Boy was I wrong (I’ve received advice from many married people that this trend will persist). Halfway through the wedding, she had somehow found the time to compile a slideshow of her work to that point, and showed us a glimpse while we ate dinner.
We haven’t received the final photos yet, but she just dropped this video preview of her trip to NYC and our wedding (the wedding starts at 0:30).
If you have a wedding, engagement, or any other important event coming up, I’d highly highly highly recommend Julianna J Photography.